Excuses, Excuses

It’s Monday, so the fresh start of a week. It is mid-month so we can’t use brand new month, but we can use a new writing challenge.

What’s that, you say? A new writing challenge?

You heard me. It’s another one of those 30 day affairs. I’m not sure how many writers/authors/bloggers are taking part, but I, JC WingRandy Brown (The Creator)Author Carol Cassada, and a few others will be!

Where’s the graphic? Right here! The hashtag is #PNIWritingChallenge, which stands for Potatoes Not Included. Did I mention Randy is from Idaho, home of the more amazing U.S. spuds? I always get excited when I go to Five Guys Burgers and Fries and they’re using Idahoan potatoes for the day/week. Yeah, I tend to forget but Randy is indeed from there.

As you can see at the top of the graphic there is a bonus exercise. I will complete that one before the 30 days are up. I’ve always enjoyed extra credit.

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I suppose it’s time we dive right in! The first question/topic asks, “Most Clever Excuse for Procrastination”?

First, may I just say that using procrastination instead of procrastinating makes me feel like it’s a country I may want to go visit someday. Then again I live in a perpetual state of procrastination so maybe the country surrounds me and I’m the first resident? I don’t know. If I am, though, dibs on being Procrast-ident. Like president but not. Hehehehe.

Second, may I also say that adding the word clever in there is slightly evil. I mean, I think I’m clever but Lord knows others may disagree with me. I do have some excuses that are ridiculous so let’s go in that direction.

My mornings are good. If I don’t work on the writing challenges immediately after taking the dog for his morning constitutional I will get twitchy like a kid coming down from a sugar high that’s lasted six months.

It’s the afternoons when I am supposed to be working on the Works in Progress that the excuses begin.

“Well, if I start it now, I’ll forget to eat lunch so I should probably eat first.”

“I can’t eat lunch until I load the dishwasher and scrub those counters.”

“There’s no food (that I want) in the apartment, I should go to the store.”

“If I’m going to the store, I better make a list.”

“I should probably go to the home gym and do my back and neck exercises before I go to the store.”

“I can’t find my shoes or headphones, so instead of going to the home gym, I’ll lay on my living room floor and do them.”

“Oh, the animals want to play. I should play with them and then go to the store.”

“Okay, I’m home, with food. Somehow I lost two hours. Where do my days go? Huh, I should eat and get going on the laptop before I lose the light of day.”

“Crap, now that I ate I am feeling sleepy. I should probably have a rest so the words are fresh. Bed, here I come! Animals! Mom wants a nap! Let’s go!” *clap clap*

“Well Hell, now I only have about an hour until I leave to pick up My Companion from his office job. If I start working on it now, I may lose track of time and he’d be stuck there like one of those poor kids whose parents think the other was supposed to pick the kid up from school. Sitting alone on a curb and kicking rocks as he waits …. ”

As you can see, they may not be the most clever of excuses but they definitely get the job done, so there’s that.

I read an article about this once, a rather humorous one on Reddit, that called this the Vacuuming the Cat condition. Even once we’ve finished everything we can imagine to not write, “well the cat looks dusty, I should grab the vacuum …” and the cycle starts once more.

What is your favorite/least favorite excuse to procrastinate? Comments are loud and proud and totally open.

 

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